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I went to my first prenatal appointment on Monday.  I went alone.  This has gotten pretty routine for us and nothing super huge happens at the first appointment anyway.  Well as far as my husband is concerned.  For me…..  it’s huge.  Other then my abdominal muscles retreating and weakening and my constant feeling of losing my cookies, I have no real evidence of this baby actually existing!  It’s far to early to feel it.  I need to hear or see it.  

The normal nurses were on vacation at my OB’s office so he had some fill-ins.  Oy….  what a mess.  I practically ran my own appointment.  Thankfully I’ve been down this road before.  I can’t imagine what a first time Mom would be feeling.  Yikes.  

I’ve mentioned before that I LOVE my OB.  Yes, LOVE him.  I know male OB’s make some women uncomfortable but mine is simply phenomenal and will go way out of his way to ensure that there is complete trust and compassion between his patients and him.  That said, his nurse made me get undressed right away instead of waiting for him to come and talk to me.  Why not be under only a sheet when you first see your doctor??!  I laughed it off and thought well, this will be fun.  Sure enough, he walks in and immediately comments on how he prefers to say hello to his patients fully dressed before he gets down to business.  Ha!!  Of course I can’t leave it alone, I have to make some sort of inappropriate comment to make him blush like a school girl.  I know him well enough to know he’ll find the humor in it rather then it being completely out of order.  But he embarrasses easily and I MUST take advantage of this 🙂  

We go through the normal physical examination and all is well.  Then comes my favorite part.  It doesn’t matter how many kids you’ve had, hearing that heartbeat for the first time takes my breath away.  It’s such an emotional time and it’s my first real bonding experience with my unborn baby.  I love it every time.  This was the first time my husband was not present for this part.  It just doesn’t affect him like it does me.  I was missing him there for it.  Apparently that expression was more then evident on my face.  The good doc picked up on it immediately.  He left the Doppler on my stomach a little while longer, took my hand and just let me listen to that little chugging train beating away.  He told me every time he does this for women, whether it be planned pregnancy, single mother’s, first timers or those who’ve been down this road many times before, his heart is always touched.  That first time you hear that heart beating is such a great blessing.  It’s confirming sounds instantly wraps your heart in happiness.  I’ve told him before I could listen to that sound all day long.  He knew that first time was something special for me.  He has hundreds of patients that he sees every week/month/year.  He remembered how much love that sound and let me have that moment a little while longer.  I was happy he allowed me to listen to it for a minute or so.  It’s usually a quick 15 sec listen, they record the heart rate and away you go.  

I text my husband instantly that we heard the heartbeat already and it was beating away nice and strong.  He said he didn’t think we’d hear it already so he elected not to come for family history review and felt bad he missed it.  I felt a little relieved knowing this but still sad that he missed the first opportunity to connect with this one.  It’s hard for the Dad’s to do this to begin with because they don’t have the physical connection until the baby is born.

My husband is still really happy the heartbeat is strong and disappointed he wasn’t there to hear it.  I can still hear that little heart beating away in my mind and I love my doctor even more for his comforting words.  My heart is full 🙂

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