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I have a friend.  It’s a male friend.  He means so much to me.  I’ve told my husband about him but not to the magnitude I should.  He really is a friend.  Not a threat.  We are worlds apart yet we are so close.  He is so like my husband it’s scary.  I am so like his troubled daughter it’s scary.

We’ve been in contact since shit has hit the fan for me and my husband.  He helps keep my mind focused on the positive.  He keeps me focused on what is important and helps me eliminate the crazy.  I do the same for him.  I was once ‘his daughter’.  If that makes sense.  A very trouble teen/adolescent.  I get it.  I hope I remember it when my daughter gets to be that age.

I am following his daughter on twitter and tumblr.  It’s so painful.  We actually see the same therapist.  It’s even more painful.  The relationship she ‘thinks’ she is in is so tragic and painful and awful and bad and any other hurtful useless word I could think of.  This guy is literally the most unfocused, unmotivated, useless waste of space right now that has ever lived.  He literally just wants to sit on the beach, smoke pot & watch the waves all day long.  “fuck working” is what one of his posts say.  It’s obvious he screws around with other girls.  She (friend’s daughter) see it but is in this extreme depression & denial over it.  I feel so helpless and awful because I know exactly what she is feeling and I see the train wreck that is about to ensue and yet I can’t do anything about it.  It’s awful.

My heart hurts for my friend.  I wish I could make this punk just vanish.  If I couldn’t do that I wish I could find someone to help his daughter to see her self worth and this piece of shit just isn’t worth it.  And if that couldn’t happen maybe he could be reformed to not be a piece of shit.  Either way I feel such heart ache for them.  Both for different reasons.  I wish I could take it all away.

Oh my God….she is me 15 years ago.  Poor girl.

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